Saturday, September 09, 2006

An Epiphany

Today I discovered that I am fat. Obese. A LARDO!

According to Body Mass Index calculations a normal (Read: healthy) person’s BMI should be between 18.5 and 24.9.
I am 25.62 and devastated!

I work out twice a week (three times a week during the ski season) and eat a healthy diet of fruits, vegetables, whole grains and lean meats. Okay, maybe I eat mass quantities of fruits, vegetables, whole grains and lean meats but they’re healthy nonetheless.

(Mrs. Yak who is an over-the-shoulder-butinski says I am leaving out the chips & dip and the cookies. There is a stickler in every crowd!)

I’m not sure what I can do differently. I am careful of my lifestyle choices.

(Mrs. Butinski is adding to my snack list from the other room and the phrase “massive quantities” seems to be rearing its ugly head again.)

In any case I will never view myself the same way again. I am labeled. I am a statistic!

Perhaps now I can apply successfully for that state disabled parking permit so I won’t have to walk so far to the grocery store.

7 Comments:

Blogger OG said...

Stand next to me - then ask the first person who walks by how you look.

8:48 PM  
Blogger Shiloh Guy said...

I too used the formula to figure out my BMI but apparently my calculator is broken.

10:21 AM  
Blogger Shiloh Guy said...

At first I thought that was a picture of me but then I noticed his tattoos don't match mine.

10:22 AM  
Blogger Yakimaniac said...

Mrs. Yak wants that picture gone. Now! She can't bear looking at it.

10:28 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Could this be the onset of frequent trips to the bathroom for purging oneself? The YB family has found that wearing only black - black on black, black with black, or just a large touch of black - can be a real assist in the body image world. Try it and then even your purging will be less evident...black can hide a multitude of sins and stains, including vomit.

4:36 PM  
Blogger Smoking Christian said...

Well, you look great in that picture! I'm going to put a copy of it on my refrigerator and dream about how I could look so svelte! (Are you going to finish that ice cream cone?)

Meanwhile, I still can't get over Shiloman "celebrating" is birthday on 9/11! How callous of him!

1:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

YO SC! Please refer to comments on Shilohman's blog regarding his birthday. I hate repeating myself...

3:14 PM  

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